Interview with Brian Kiener

17-12-12-BK.docx




“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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HIV in My Day – Interview 17


December 12, 2017
Interviewee: Brian Kiener (P); Interviewer: Ben Klassen (BK)

Ben Klassen: We are getting started this morning talking to Brian. We like to start these
interviews by asking guys how they first came into the gay community or started engaging in gay
life.

Brian Kiener (P): For myself, I grew up just outside Vancouver in Surrey. Went through high
school, never identified as a gay man. I never had any role models, I didn’t have any friends in
high school who identified as gay. Pretty much figured I was on my own with that. I kind of
dated girls thinking I could somehow cover that up, but that never really worked out. And then
after high school, I had a great group of friends. And it wasn’t until I was twenty-years-old when
I had my first sexual encounter with a man and that – I was still living in Surrey at the time with
a straight roommate – gorgeous actually – and I had brought a date home, one of the first guys I
had sex with. And I was – I kind of outed myself thinking my roommate and his girlfriend were
at a football game, when in fact she was in the other room, and I had no idea. So, I was basically
caught and it was not well received. So, after that experience, I had moved downtown and that’s
when I first started having my first sexual experiences, and that would have been around 1983.
Did I answer your question?

BK: Yeah, absolutely, and at that time, in 1983, were you engaging in the community?

P: To be honest, I was kind of on my own in those days. I was – I remember it being the summer
of ‘83 and I used to go down to English Bay and suntan and hangout down there, ‘cause it was
obvious at that time there were a lot of gay men in English Bay. And I ended up befriending a
guy named Mike who was quite out there, and he introduced me to a lot of friends, gay and
straight. I wasn’t really identifying at that point, I was kind of loosely identifying, and that’s
about the time that I felt comfortable.

BK: Any sense of what, from your vantage point, the gay community looked like around that
time?

P: My memories are sort of Davie Street in the hay day when the sex workers were
monopolizing the streets at night and it was just kind of a free for all. It was quite the scene. I
mean, I remember coming downtown with a group of straight guys after a party in South
Burnaby, and driving around and checking out the scene, talking to the prostitutes on the street,
through the window. And one of the guys that I was with knew one of these women, and she
ended up joining us in the car and we picked up some beer and we ended up at what was
affectionately known as the fruit loop down by Sunset Beach and we parked in the parking lot
there. It was a summer night drinking beer, and that’s when I really noticed the men – hundreds
of men, in fact – cruising back and forth. That was kind of exciting for me, but I wasn’t really
involved in the community so to speak at the time.

BK: So, not going to bars or clubs.





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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P: No, not at that point.

BK: Was there a point when it really clicked for you and you realized, “Yeah, that’s what I am?”

P: Oh yeah, I knew at that point that I was identifying as a gay man for sure, and I was pretty
excited about returning to that place, to be honest.

BK: I don’t blame you. It sounds like a very sexually charged environment at the time.

P: Yeah, for someone who suppressed their sexuality for, I would say, late-teens until twenty, I
was excited about exploring my sexuality for sure.

BK: Must have felt very freeing.

P: Yes.

BK: When did you first hear about HIV and AIDS? Was it something you were hearing about
fairly early on?

P: It was fairly early on. I remember I had met this guy and he had taken me back to his place. It
was not far from the fruit loop and we were engaging, and he told me. He said, “I had heard
about this gay plague,” and he said he was only going to use condoms. And it was just a sense of
fear that he instilled to me and I remember that moment always. I really – at that moment I really
didn’t know what to do with that information. I think I was very naïve in those days, very naïve.

BK: How did you make use, or come to understand that first information? What was your
reaction to it I guess?

P: My reaction was probably a bit of denial, thinking, “Oh no, how could that affect me?” How
could that affect myself? I wasn’t quite sure what to do with it at that point. That was early on, so
that would have been before I was diagnosed – that was probably still 1983.

BK: Wow, that is very early on.

P: Yup.

BK: And after that initial first learning of this plague, did you know of any other information that
was out there or did you access any information that was out there prior to your diagnosis?

P: No, I did not. I think shortly after that experience, this fellow, Mike, that I spoke about
meeting at the beach – and I was brought into a social circle of straight people, lesbian and gay.
And I started working at a men’s clothing store on Robson Street at the time called Rascals, and
it was owned by a very large and out gay man and his partner, and I started working there as a
sales associate and that is where I felt a lot of comfort and belonging. So, during those times, that
was still early on, but yeah.





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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BK: Still kind of thinking about that period, was it visible in the community? Were you seeing
AIDS or HIV?

P: I don’t think at that point you were seeing people with full blown AIDS, not that I knew. I
think you heard the spoken word, you heard the concern and maybe a bit of fear, but really there,
my experience didn’t really… yeah.

BK: There wasn’t a lot of solid information or facts out there.

P: No.

BK: It was just word of mouth.

P: Word of mouth, rumour. When was Rock Hudson – when did that whole thing come up? That
was early on, right? Yeah.

BK: That was maybe ‘85, so yeah, that was still very early.

P: Yes.

BK: I guess was… because there wasn’t a lot of good information out there, was your sexual
behaviour changing at all, or was it more like we really don’t know what’s going on…?

P: I would agree with your second. There wasn’t a lot of information and it didn’t seem to stop
my exploration with my sexuality. Through that work experience I met a lot of gay guys at the
time. There was a gay bar called Neighbours kitty corner to the store. I worked and I didn’t live
that far away – I was on Nelson and Denman in a small studio and I guess I was a bit wishy
washy as a late teen not knowing myself, not knowing who I was. It was kind of
transformational, the first – or my early twenties, trying to discover who I was as a person. So,
you know, I did have sexual relationships. The guy who infected me I had met through the store.
He would come in with other friends at some point and I was very attracted to him and I pursued
that, and yeah.

BK: Shifting a little bit, 1986 testing becomes available. Can you take us inside your decision
making about getting tested? Was that obvious that you had to do it or was it more conflicted?

P: Well, so 1984 is basically – tested positive. I had already been seeing my GP, Phil Sestak,
who was brand new from med school. He had set up practice here, 1200 Burrard. He became my
new GP early on, and I remember in 1984, probably was springtime when I sero-converted. I
was very sick – felt like a terrible flu that lasted about two weeks. I remember having to take
time off work. I also was co-infected with Hepatitis B from this fellow, so I remember returning
to work, ill, still not feeling well, but who knew? There was no test. So, going forward two years,
1986, when the test did become available was when I found out.

BK: And at that time did you start to get more information about what was going on?





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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P: Absolutely. At that point, fast forward to maybe 1985, there were men coming down with the
symptoms of AIDS and the crisis had well engaged itself. That period lasted – I was only at that
job working at the store for maybe eight months before I started with the airlines. I had a twenty-
year career with the airlines and I didn’t tell anybody. I mean, 1986 came around, I started
working for the airlines in 1985, and once I did have my diagnosis in 1986, I didn’t share it with
anybody. I was terrified. I really don’t know how – how I dealt with that early diagnosis. It was
scary and I really kept it to myself. I didn’t really share it with anybody.

BK: That was just related to stigma?

P: Stigma for sure. Once I had started with the airline as a flight attendant, the United States had
a policy of no entry for HIV positive people, so that would have totally influenced my job – I
wouldn’t have been technically able to do my job. This is post-diagnosis now. I was terrified of
anybody knowing, so I really didn’t share it with anybody. I think I did join PWA Society as a
member, I did sign up as a member in those early years, but I never accessed any of their
programs or any of their support. I just seemed to carry the burden on my own. Maybe it was a
sense of shame, but I was resolute in staying strong in those days. I just – I did watch – it did hit
home closely when I found out that other friends of mine, close friends of mine, were in fact HIV
positive and started showing symptoms and becoming sick. Even in the early days of it, I just…

I am probably fast tracking to 1988 now. I had a good friend [name], who was a larger than life
guy, who had a great set of friends. He always had a laugh – he was a very creative guy, he
would do window displays, he was a very creative guy. I really admired him. He moved away to
Toronto, to stay with another friend and that kind of signalled his way of escaping the stigma and
everything here in Vancouver – the anonymity maybe. And the next time I saw him was him
coming home and I had heard that he was ill, but he came home. He was living at his dad’s place
in North Burnaby, and I contacted him ‘cause I wanted to see him. I picked him up to go for
lunch – I took him to Earl’s restaurant somewhere near Metrotown, and when I picked him up at
the door, he was a skeleton of a man, half of who he was – typical full-blown AIDS. Looked like
he had been transformed into an eighty-year-old man, very fragile. And it was shocking for me.
He died not so long after that. I mean there was a lot of other deaths going on at that time in the
late ‘80s and it actually strengthened my resolve. I knew it didn’t – his death didn’t need to
happen. It was rejection, denial, fear, all those things that seemed to me at the time to help
progress the disease. That kind of strengthened me, my resolve at that time. What I witnessed
myself was I acknowledged the fear and the denial and all the loss of dignity that were adding to
the crisis, and it actually did make me stronger.

BK: That is when it really – that was a huge turning point for you.

P: Pretty much was. I was in my late-twenties at the time, I was kind of living day-to-day. I
didn’t expect to live till thirty – I didn’t, but my bloodwork and everything stayed good, it really
did. My T4 cell count and my blood work remained good for many years. I just lived day-to-
day. I was working in an industry I really enjoyed, I was around great people, I had a great
airline around me, and felt supported in my life – was travelling and making the best of my life.






“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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BK: How did you look after your health in those early years? Was it really intentional or was it
putting one foot in front of the other?

P: Well, you know, the whole HIV – when the diagnoses come to bear and someone is telling
you that you have a potentially life-threatening disease and you’re not going to live very long,
it’s a strange. One, because your body doesn’t reflect that – I mean I was perfectly healthy, it
didn’t affect my day-to-day life. With my work, I was working shift work, sometimes early
morning, sometimes lack of sleep a bit. Nut I think generally I have always taken care of myself.
I was going to the gym, I was always active playing tennis, rollerblading, cycling, whatever,
trying to enjoy life. That’s about all I could do at that time.

BK: You didn’t – since you were healthy, you didn’t have to go on any treatments.

P: There was no treatment then. I don’t know when they started using AZT – I think it was the
early-‘90s? At some point my GP did put me on AZT. It was more – his philosophy was more
preventative than actual treatment. So, I was on and off of AZT and DDI in the early days,
probably potentially lethal doses at those times. And then I remember at some point they
believed in this drug holiday where they would put you on treatment and take you off for a few
months and put you back on. That was a mistake ‘cause they found out later on that it accelerated
drug resistance, which down the road I suffered from. I became drug resistant to two
classifications of HIV medications, and then the mid-‘90s when HAART came around and
treatment came, I obviously – my T-cell counts were slowly dipping, went below 300 for the first
time since I was infected. So, I think from twenty-one to around thirty-one, I would say my
immune system stayed quite intact and then it started to slowly dip below to the point where my
GP thought that I should be on treatment and then I did do the treatment. I was never on a
protease inhibitor until late on – it was probably around 2000, and I became undetectable then
and have remained undetectable since then. I don’t know what your question was now.

BK: I think that was a pretty big part of the picture and important to capture that I think. For
some people, ‘96 was a crazy turning point and for other people who had been on AZT for a long
time, actually it didn’t solve a lot of problems for some people who had already had some
resistance issues. It varies a lot from person to person. You mentioned that when you were first
diagnosed there was no seeking out support, at least from an AIDS organization, for instance.
Why was that?

P: I think what happened is I had created my chosen family – I had a close-knit group of friends
at the time that I could share this with that were also HIV positive. It felt like a family and I think
I relied on that support a lot and I just had this resolve – I don’t know what it was. I always felt
strong inside, like this wasn’t going to defeat me, so I’m not sure why I never seeked out other
support. I mean, it was definitely available. I think it was the anonymity and the issues I
described with my work environment that kept me from reaching out.

Were you aware of what some of those community organizations were doing at the time?






“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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P: I saw the organization, I saw the support for others that already had full blown AIDS – I saw
that support. I didn’t identify as having AIDS. It was still like an oxymoron: someone is telling
you, health professionals were telling you… It was a real mind fuck, really.

BK: Sticking with the community organizations, were you engaging with them in any way, like
with information being put out into the community or were you getting most of your information
from your doctor?

P: Mostly from my doctor. I trusted him. I probably saw him every two weeks back in those
days. I felt very safe with my GP. I really trusted him and if he felt I should do this, or change
that, or go on treatment, I went with it. I went with the flow. I saw everything in the media I read.
I lived through my friends own personal experiences. That’s about the extent of what I was
hearing.

BK: You created this support network for yourself, or you already had a support network, and so
that is where a lot of your support was coming from.

P: I would say so. I pretty much identified as a victim in those days. I didn’t really know what to
expect for as far as whether I was going to survive till thirty, like I said, or… live day-to-day. I
was travelling, I was exploring the word, I was with the airlines, I had quite a bit of time off. I
started working at The Keg in the fish house and extra income coming in and I would use that to
travel, and I was just trying to make the best of my life at that time.

BK: You spoke of your early experience with your doctor. Having had other HIV positive
friends, can you kind of generalize what the early medical response looked like to the epidemic?
Were your friends having similarly positive experiences or not so much?

P: I mean, I just recall all these AIDS conferences. I was always anxious to know what would
come out of each conference every year and doctors’ philosophies changed and went back and
forth like a volley ball or a badminton game. It was like they were running with it as much as the
patients were.

BK: There was a lot of uncertainty.

P: There was a lot of uncertainty, yeah. And a lot of death still.

BK: Yes. You also talked a little bit earlier about the pervasive sense of fear. Was that coming
from within the community, from outside the community, from everywhere?

P: The fear was coming from inside the community, for sure. I remember we – there was one
fella that I worked with, [name], he was a South American guy, flight attendant, and he was
diagnosed with AIDS around 1990. And he was very loved by a lot of people in the industry and
once that became out in the open, he was… I was – he was so well supported, and people – it
broke down a lot of barriers for people dealing with someone who was HIV in their peer group,
and it was very comforting to see that. It sort of allowed me to release some of those fears of my





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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own about hiding my own HIV. But [name] passed and it really changed attitudes. I was quite
surprised by that and heart warmed by that.

BK: Was there a sense that attitudes were changing elsewhere in society, moving into the ‘90s?

P: Yes, I do think so. I think people realized that you weren’t going to contract HIV from
touching somebody or giving somebody a kiss. Yeah, that was good to see. There was still a lot
of unknowns back then, so…

BK: Do you have any memories of what mainstream reactions looked like?

P: I still remember Ronald Reagan back in those days, he was quite supportive of the AIDS
movement. Then movie stars like Elizabeth Taylor, very outspoken. There was a real morality
issue too connected with being gay and HIV, which was still really prevalent. Things were
slowly changing for sure.

BK: Like the epidemic intersecting with homophobia?

P: True.

BK: Did you experience some of that yourself?

P: I experienced homophobia in my workplace for sure. But I also broke down a lot of barriers,
especially with the pilot group. I didn’t allow them to – I just remained strong to who I was as a
person. I didn’t come across threatening. I wasn’t come across overly gay, and I didn’t threaten
pilots that way. It was quite amazing how mindsets changed over the years and the acceptance of
gay employees in that industry changed tremendously. I had a good network of friends and
family there that I was very grateful for in those days.

BK: And I’m sure that shift was reflected elsewhere as well.

P: But in those days I didn’t even out myself to any of my family members. I was terrified of
letting my mother know because she was a nurse and I just – she’s going to be harping on me
about not staying out too late and not drinking, and so I just I didn’t tell her. I think I finally told
my sister in the mid-‘90s and she became my support network on the family side and that was…

BK: That is around your HIV status. Were you out to your family in terms of being a gay man?

P: Oh yeah, as far as being a gay man, I kind of outed myself in my early-twenties and being gay
in my family was never an issue. I’m really thankful for that, grateful. I was not judged –
everyone accepted me and really became a non-issue for me.

BK: But that additional level of coming out that comes with being positive, that’s a totally
different matter.

P: That was a different matter, yes.





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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BK: Did stigma show up a lot within the gay community?

P: Absolutely, in the form of rejection, in the form of feeling less than – oh yeah, for sure. Oh, I
experienced many times throughout my life as far as dating, meeting people, there was still a lot
of fear and a lot of ignorance. Even present moment – education, education, education. But this
is an entirely different world we are living in now.

BK: How has stigma changed over time? Has it lessened, changed?

P: No, it has lessened for sure. I think with the medical knowledge we have now, being
undetectable, and the current science that is out there, I think – well, what has really surprised me
is how the younger generation, when disclosure comes, it’s really a non-issue and people aren’t
fearful or rejecting. It happens – rejection is just something that one with HIV probably will
always live with, but it’s not the same rejection that existed in the onset.

BK: So, there is kind of a generational gap in the present in the case of younger guys who are
growing up with undetectability?

P: For sure. I think PrEP and just the knowledge out there about undetectable, the science around
it all has really changed attitudes a lot, and it’s good to see it. It’s a more comforting world to
live in for sure and it also allows a person like myself just to feel free and not have to – like, you
need to hide behind the veil of HIV. I don’t identify myself as – I sort of had this resolve way
back that I was never going to die of HIV and I don’t identify with – I don’t identify it as who I
am. It’s part of me, but it’s not me.

BK: That’s really interesting, because I know that for some people it has become part of their
identity and for others not at all. Like, being positive has become part of some people’s identity.

P: I think what my own experience was is in my early-thirties I really objectively had to take a
look inside and really think, you know what? I don’t think I’m ever going to die of HIV and I
better start making some plans for the rest of my life. So, I think in my early-thirties I had an ah-
ha moment and epiphany, and I consciously decided to move forward in my life. And that was a
very healthy turning point for me, and it kind of went from victim to empowered. And I think
that was a great turning point for myself and my life trajectory – kind of took off from that point
and here I am almost retired at fifty-five with a lot of accomplishments under my belt and
financial freedom, and the opportunity to explore and enjoy my life, so…

BK: Seems like it has been a very good decision. When did you have that realization? You said
early-thirties?

P: I think I was about thirty-three at the time – it was ‘9-. Born in ’63, so do the math.

BK: So, around ‘96 or somewhere around there.

P: Yeah.





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

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BK: So, was part of that realization also HAART and the cocktail and having the sense we might
actually have something effective here?

P: That is true. The empowerment that there was something that was going to stop people from
dying of AIDS, yeah, that was a great moment.

BK: No kidding. Did HIV change the way you related to the gay community or how you were
involved in the gay community?

P: Not necessarily, no. I still wasn’t really going around saying, “Hey, how are you doing? My
name is Brian. I am HIV positive.” I was still pretty much in the closet about that part of my life.
But you know, I have always been pretty selective about the people that I choose as my friends
and I wanted to be around – I had a great social network at that time, I’ve always been pretty
blessed to have great fiends, even at thirty. And when forty came around, I really realized how
blessed I was with my friends, with the friends I had in my life. It didn’t really make whatever –
what other people thought out there didn’t really matter to me. I was still kind of incensed by
ignorance at times and it angered me, but what do you do? I mean, I think that’s – you know, I
think it was my mid-forties when I really started realizing that I started needing to give back. I
was at a point in my life that I had the opportunity to start giving back and that is when I started
volunteering with Positive Living Society.

BK: And that was kind of your first real interaction with community-based HIV organizations?

P: Yes.

BK: What did you – it seems like an important part of your story, so what did you end up doing
with Positive Living?

P: Well, did the volunteer training and then I went as a participant on one of the healing retreats
and went on that. And even when I went on that retreat I felt kind of guilty ‘cause I felt in my
own personal situation – I felt like I felt guilt cause I felt someone else should be there other than
me and… But I soon discovered that by the end of that retreat that I was definitely deserved of
that retreat and the support that I was given. I guess I really realized at that point I had been a
fool not to seek out support, and then, I guess after that retreat someone had recommended me as
a team member for the retreat team as a junior ranger, so I was excited about that. I didn’t really
know where I wanted to fit in as far as the volunteer experience, and that felt right for me, so I
joined the retreat team and yeah – eight years later, twice a year. I didn’t make it all the time, I
think there were a couple of retreats I didn’t go to. I think that for me on that retreat it really – I
inspired youth, I really identified with the younger people that were on the retreats and the small
group sessions sharing. I came away with my heart full from those retreats, so it was amazing,
yeah.

BK: Thinking of – I’m going to guess you were engaging with long-term survivors but also
people that were newly diagnosed?






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P: The spectrum was all over the place. One of the functions we did in the opening circle is
arrange ourselves in the gymnasium chronologically from newly diagnosed to long term survivor
and it ended up forming a horseshoe in the gym and I was always at the very end or toward the
very end, looking across at the newly diagnosed person and it was a very powerful experience.

BK: I feel like those groups of people don’t always have an opportunity to talk with each other –
like, newly diagnosed and long-term survivors. In some ways I think the realities they face are
quite different, but what kind of advice would you give to newly diagnosed…?

P: I don’t think our position there was to give advice. Instead of advice, I would just give
support, just you know, “Look, I’m happy, healthy, and middle-aged.” That was inspiring in its
own, just to put somebody in a sense of comfort, acceptance was enough, I think. I think what
these retreats was was just a safe place where HIV was really secondary. It is hard to describe.
Just being surrounded by supportive, no judgement, it was a great place for newly diagnosed
people to be. I mean, god, if I had known in the early days that sort of support, I certainly would
have accessed it.

BK: Thinking outside of the retreat context, do you as a long-term survivor have any advice for
the younger generation of gay men that are engaging in the community now and maybe engaging
with HIV in different way because it means something different for them. What in your
experience seems like it might be relevant to younger guys today?

P: There is still an education element where it is surprising how ignorant people still are. I
recently gave a young guy an HIV 101 online texting and I just felt compelled to do that because
I realized that this person had no idea what undetectable meant, didn’t know much about HIV at
all. My advice would be the education element is still in need of – that has never changed.
There’s PrEP now, so there is a two-sided argument with it. Great if it lessens infection rates,
that’s wonderful, but then it gives an excuse for sexual behaviour to just, you know – you know,
the use of condoms now is very ambiguous. Younger generation, they didn’t see the fear, they
didn’t see the death, they didn’t experience it – they can’t, they won’t experience any of that, so
it’s – the attitudes out there are quite different.

BK: Did the epidemic change the community in any way that you can put your finger on? Like,
looking at your experience of Vancouver in 1983, ‘84 and then looking from your perspective at
what Vancouver’s gay community looks like now. Is there anything that’s changed and is HIV
related to any of that change?

P: Sure, we’ve – it’s… my generation has created a sense of a safety network, most of the hard
work has been done. How it continues, I’m not quite sure. Education, I mean there are great
resources for gay men now, youth, gay youth? I mean they have YouthCO, they have HIM, they
have a lot of resources now, a lot of support, and just a… you know, testing. It’s changed the
community for sure.

BK: I guess the community’s response to the epidemic laid a lot of infrastructure for how we
deal with sexual health today in the community.






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P: For sure. Most of the hard work has been done, you know. I think gay youth are vulnerable
and to have the ability to make good decisions about their own sexual health is something that
may not have been available when I was a gay youth. So, people have to make their decisions,
like I said when tested positive there was a little bit of information out there but I was very naïve.

BK: There’s a lot more information out there now. Whether people are accessing the information
is a different matter.

P: Mhm.

BK: It certainly seems that there is a lot more of it out there.

P: And people are plugged into their devices, the internet is out there at their whim.

BK: How did the community – any sense of how the community made it through the epidemic?
In your story, personal resiliency is a big factor, but on a community level, what do you think got
us through this?

P: I think what got us through this was knowing that we had to rely on each other for a lot of it,
because government and society wasn’t necessarily there to support us, so it was let’s support
each other and I think that was transformational. There was a lot of strides made through that
process, and I would say, yeah, it was probably…

BK: Kind of a sense of the community coming together? And even though you didn’t engage in
the ASOs, you were a part of the community in the sense that you were forming your own
community. How has the meaning of HIV changed for you as someone who has been positive
for over thirty years?

P: The meaning for me is that HIV doesn’t really mean AIDS anymore and that is a significant
difference. Not to lessen the impact of HIV for us here in a developed first world country with
access to medication and treatment, support, whatever we need, it’s available, which is fantastic.
So, it has really changed the face of HIV, but still in the world at large, it’s without treatment,
without – people are still succumbing to AIDS and it’s still a tragedy in the world.

BK: Definitely has different meanings depending on geographically where you are.

P: For sure, yeah.

BK: Any sense of things that could be improved or rethought on the HIV prevention or support
side of things? Looking more at the side of healthcare provision?

P: I’m still questioning PrEP and it has been around for a while now. I would like to see what the
studies say in the end, but I mean the only true way of fighting the epidemic is by keeping people
from being infected and I think education is still foremost. I still think that in schools, and in
elementary schools through high school, there needs to be more sex education, there needs to be
more information at an early age. I have been involved with Out in Schools over the years and I





“HIV in My Day,” Brian Kiener (December 12, 2017)

12

think that’s a fantastic program. It addresses, it’s face on, and then there is the other side of HIV
these days which is more related to. It was a gay man’s disease it seemed like for so long and it
has all turned around. Gay men aren’t the highest risk group for new infections anymore and I
think in the Indigenous community, they need the outreach that I think gay men had in the early
days. I think that needs to change in our society. HIV, drug users – the whole face of it has
changed.

BK: Did you see that shift happening when you were at Positive Living?

P: Yeah, it was noticeable, yeah, especially the stories that we shared by some of the Aboriginal
people that came on the retreats. It is quite shocking to hear from their own mouths, from their
own communities on the reservations, etc., how access and how stigma and all the crap that they
deal with. You know, they don’t have the access to the healthcare that we have necessarily being
from small communities. It’s a big problem out there.

BK: I think I am out of the main things I was hoping to ask you. We definitely want to leave
some room for you to add anything that I haven’t had a chance to ask you, so if there are any
stories that you haven’t had a chance to share yet, you can take a moment to think about that.

P: What can I say, thirty-four years later, I am blessed with my life and going through this whole
experience I often ask myself how I survived, why me? But I think my own resilience and
strength has been a chapter or a part of that chapter, and um, yeah. I feel blessed that I have my
life, so that’s how I would like to end it.

BK: It’s pretty amazing, it really is.